Purveyors of deeply unimportant knowledge · est. MMXXVI
IGNOTUM PER IGNOTIUS
“the unknown, explained by the even more unknown”
The Department maintains an expanding archive of field guides,
specimens, and official notices concerning matters no reasonable institution would fund.
Findings are distributed on shirts, mugs, stickers, prints, and other approved substrates.
26 findings on file. Catalog expands nightly. Filter by division:
Returned to the Network Ghost Shirt — Dark Cute Mycology Tee, MushroomSpore Archive Skeleton Shirt — Dark Cute Mycology Tee, Mushroom CollecPeak Allocation Shirt — Funny Anti-Motivational Retro Computing Tee, IField Session Observation Log Shirt — Lo-Fi Aesthetic Naturalist Tee, Runner Diagnostics Terminal Shirt — Funny Run Club Retro Computing TeeExpedition Report Gravel Cycling Shirt — Funny Bikepacking Gift, VintaMoth Observation Log Shirt — Vintage Entomology Tee, Citizen Science NSystem Architecture Celestial Chart Shirt — Retro Computing Astronomy Drove Four Hours for a Bird Shirt — Funny Birding Tee, Absurdist BirdwIncident Summary Gravel Cycling Shirt — Funny Bikepacking Gift, SpecifGhost Spore Print Shirt — Dark Cute Mycology Tee, Funny Mushroom GhostAnatomy of an Unplanned Shot Shirt — Funny Golf Science Tee, Bad GolfeEdible Confidence Interval Shirt — Funny Foraging Field Guide Tee, MycRoute Confirmed Terrain Estimated Shirt — Funny Bikepacking NavigationFootage: Tuesday Shirt — Funny VHS Aesthetic Tee, Lo-Fi Camcorder HumoSubstrate Is Colonizing Shirt — Funny Mycology Anti-Motivational Tee, Cost-Benefit Analysis Shirt — Funny Bikepacking Anti-Motivational Tee,You'll Know the House Shirt — Funny Pennsylvania Rural Directions Tee,Thousand and Four Messages Shirt — Funny Medieval Inbox Tee, Neo-MedieGravel Cycling Taxonomy Shirt — Funny Bikepacking Gift, Vintage NaturaMycelium Network Anatomy Shirt — Accurate Mycology Gift, Mushroom ForaCold Plunge Streak Shirt — Funny Wellness Biohacker Gift, Vintage AnatRun Crew Social Shirt — Funny Running Club Gift, Honest Runner Tee forI Would Simply Not Have Joined the Doomed Arctic ExpeditionMediocre and at Peace — Funny Anti-Motivational QuoteDeath, But Make It Cozy — Cute Grim Reaper Aesthetic
THE MONTHLY DISPATCH
REQUEST INCLUSION IN DEPARTMENTAL CORRESPONDENCE
One dispatch per month. New acquisitions, divisional bulletins, no filler.
Indicate your areas of study:
ABOUT THE DEPARTMENT
Founded MMXXVI · Budget: undisclosed · Oversight: none
The Department of Obscure Studies is the world's foremost institution — by default, as no other
institution applied — for the collection, classification, and garment-based distribution of knowledge
that serves no practical purpose whatsoever. Our researchers operate in the manner of a museum gift
shop run by a sardonic engineer: vintage plates, retro instrumentation, and dry wit, maintained to
exacting standards nobody requested.
DEPARTMENTAL DOCTRINE
Article I. We are rigorous about things that don't matter.
Article II. All findings are peer-reviewed by nobody.
Article III. No matter shall be deemed too obscure; obscurity is the qualification.
Article IV. Findings are distributed exclusively on shirts, mugs, stickers, prints,
and other approved substrates.
Article V. The unknown shall, wherever possible, be explained by the even more
unknown. (Ignotum per ignotius.)
